05/10/2024

Necropolis28 Zombie Party Mini-Con AAR


Anyone that knows me is aware that I’m more of an RPG guy than a miniatures guy, but it’s been impossible even for me to ignore the proliferation of indie skirmish-level wargames over the last few years. It almost feels as if miniatures gaming is in a similar place to where old school RPGs were 15 years ago, first via the nostalgic/newstalgic Oldhammer movement and events such as Bring Out Your Lead, then splintering ever further into myriad Frostgrave/Mordheim inspired DIY skirmish rulesets, most of them designed to be accessible, miniature-agnostic, and veering strongly away from toxic catpiss smelling ultra-competitive rules-lawyered wargaming.

Peter Vigors’ Necropolis28 is one such game. It’s a self-proclaimed diorama skirmish wargame, with a thriving play culture that places as much emphasis on crafting ghoulish terrain as it does beautiful (and strictly undead) miniatures, and has very quickly earned itself a massive following alongside other luminaries of the sub-genre like Turnip28 and Space/Sword Weirdoes.

My good friend Stuart offered me the chance to play in a special one day Necropolis28 day at his house. He was even nice enough to offer me a lend of a beautifully painted Bone-themed Gathering (the Necropolis28 term for warband or gang) with a title referencing one of the greatest brutal death metal bands of all time. Just look at the setting and paintwork on these beauties.


I grew to love them

Of course, I had to find some way to crowbar RPGs into the weekend, so I offered to run an OD&D hack allowing play in the twisted undead in the world of Necropolis (The Endless City). Like all of my “quick projects” I ended up putting quite a lot of work into it (read: fuckloads) but more on that later!

Heading up to Stafford the night before, I had the chance for a very quick crash course in Necropolis28 rules from my gracious host, as well as a quick game of Star Realms (thrashed him). Apart from that there was only time for a quick rundown of the following day’s events before bed.

The following morning brought a slow start as the whole crew (15+ people!) arrived in dribs and drabs, but this was a blessing in disguise, allowing for many hot beverages and chances to get to know folks.

Once we got started, Stu handed round zine programmes replete with his superb artwork, houserules for each of our four games and containing a bag of PUTRID mana counters and a badge (!) made for the occasion. Narratively, the event consisted of our Gatherings scouting out rumoured signs of actual living beings deep in the depths of The Endless City, while attempting to trounce rivals along the way. Mechanically this meant four scenarios devised by Stu, each of which contained new house rules and separate victory conditions. In addition, we were to keep track of points across the games for kills (more accurately, ‘Shattered’ undead), spells cast, stylish death-from-above attacks and various other metrics to calculate an overall winner for the day’s play.

Excitingly, there was a special feature in the form of the Mystery Boxes, handed around to each match, and with special activation conditions based on events happening in game. They contained extra rules and game components that were a mystery to all. For example, in our first game the activation condition was to be the first who picked up a Putrid mana token.

My Gathering was kindly lent to me by Stu since I was too much of a poser to have painted up my own set of undead models. Here’s the roster:

  • Sanctus Dismus – Lich leader capable of using the Puppet spell to send enemy models off ledges, Tireless Command to re-activate models for a further attack, and with various other abilities. Strictly Bone-themed, as was the whole crew.
  • Azkaron – Armoured fighter with a powerful polearm attack.
  • Snapris – Skeletal archer with enhanced speed, as it turned out a very useful guy to have.
  • Renlac – Fighter with a shield and bludgeon, allowing him to Push twice as hard (see below).
  • Orfang – Quick undead hound with good speed and a light attack.


Necropolis28 Game 1:

My first opponent was Matt 1 of 2, who I’d bonded with earlier while slagging off 5e D&D, so he seemed a perfect fit for my first game. We played on an excellent sanguine red board constructed by Peter that has a sort of ancient Sumerian/Mesopotamian desert vibe, at least to my ill-infomed eyes. Putrid mana tokens were dropped on the board and acted as a generic mana that could be used in place of any other type of the three standard Blood/Bone/Plasm mana triumvirate. The Mystery Box, in this case, revealed that this Putrid mana was fermenting and had a d10 table of very unpredictable side effects when touched!

Orfang prepares to plummet



Matt wasn’t messing around, quickly sending out his Lich’s familiar to grab an absolute ton of this delicious mana, which I was aghast to see gave his model a bunch of bonuses. Then, when my polearm warrior killed the familiar and allowed my Lich to pick up the dropped mana, the effect was cranial detonation, sending my dude reeling into melee combat! Not a great start.

It was a great game that advanced on two fronts above and below an open courtyard with my personal highlight being when I got Orfang the undead hound to perform a diving attack from atop an arch down onto his leader. Ultimately despite my showy theatrics, I was not to prevail, and the first match went to Matt.

Result: LOSS

Necropolis28 Game 2:

My next opponent was Ed, one of the two attendees I already sort-of-knew, both from the G+ OSR days and from his awesome series of comic zines The Blade of Arozone.

Snapris and Azkaron on the move

Our win condition was interesting as we had to have the most models within 3” of a randomly moving ghost. The match took place on the loftiest of the boards, an enormous chunk of grey rock with flat-topped ruins cresting it. I took the lucky deployment dice roll to seize the high(est) ground, reasoning Snapris’ ranged attack would mitigate the fact I was up against an all-flying enemy Gathering, and just hoping the victory ghost would end the game in one of my corners.

The mystery box this time contained some repulsive models of necrotic Bloated Flies. Attracted by the Shattered undead, they flew around and made a nuisance of themselves by spitting mucus and biting mandibles. We bid or rolled off for control of them each round, but they didn’t get in the way too much. It was fun using them to spit at models who were precariously close to a board edge though (a successful hit in Necropolis28 allows you to Push a model 1” in any direction – preferably to a nasty fall!)

My sketchy plan worked, and by the game end I held the high ground and the most models next to the ghost, who had helpfully flown all the way up to my right hand corner of the band. Thanks, ghost. Thost.

Result: WIN

Necropolis28 Game 3:

My opponent was Joe, who had one of the coolest concepts for a Gathering of the weekend – the necromancer Hob had divided himself into component parts – his circulatory system, skin, muscles, nervous system, and his eyeballs – each played by a separate model! The sickening bunch were on a quest to track down Hob’s runaway skeleton. Not only that, but Joe played as Hob’s skeleton in the OD&D game later. Now that’s narrative gaming. Amazing creativity on a budget too – each model here was constructed of nothing more than string, wire, green stuff and glue.

Hob's parts


The third scenario was a straight up bloodbath (or bonebath or plasmbath), with victory going to the player who managed to Shatter (destroy or effectively ‘unsummon’, since a surviving leader can attempt to bring lost models back to the board) the most enemy combatants. Coincidentally, each match I played throughout the day took place on more congested terrain than the last, and this ruined urban board was dominated by a large building in the centre. This meant that the first turns of each side were spent manoeuvring (Necropolis28 uses boards that are only 16” wide, a design decision to speed up play in initial turns) – I had to climb my guys down a high starting ledge, but was able to block one end of an alleyway which was to prove instrumental to my victory.


Alleyway carnage

After the first model was Shattered, it was mystery box time – this time around producing ever-spawning maggots with a high chance of causing damage in combat, potentially spawning each time another kill occurred, again with the chance to roll off for control at the end of each turn.

Although I did end up losing my Lich in this battle, I was able to score a fairly handy victory, achieved by multiple death-from-above attacks off of the very high building in the centre into the aforementioned alleyway, which soon became clogged with maggots and blood and bone mana tokens.

Result: WIN


I have dog hair



INTERLUDE: beer report
(It’s my blog and I’ll write about beer if I want to)

I brought along two fancy dark beers in very different styles: Liborious Dunkel (5.2% ABV), a German dark lager and Clotho (7% ABV), a Belgian Dubbel style from Tartarus Brewing in Leeds. Past Andrew had apparently left a bottle of Titanic Plum Porter (4.9% ABV) at Stu’s house too, which was nice of him.

Clotho (apparently the youngest of the three fates from Greek myth, shamefully had to look that one up) was definitely enjoyable, but I may have been spoiled having drunk dubbels in Europe recently. The alcohol was a bit of an overt punch on the nose, and there wasn’t too much about the beer that stuck in my memory after it was gone flavourwise, but I’d definitely give this another go.

Liborious Dunkel on the other hand, was a treat. I’ve really fallen for dark lager this year and this was a bit of a standout for me. Not as dark as some, great rush of flavours on the front end, nicely carbonated and crisp, with a really smooth aftertaste that swooped in to remind you it was a lager after all. It was around for barely enough time for me to appreciate it and served to wash down our delicious takeaway Jamaican meal very well.

Accompanying my OD&D session, the Titanic was as good as usual, not holding back on the plum but nicely tending more to the dry than the overly sweet in some sips. I’ve got to be in the mood for plum porter but this was the right time, amongst new and old friends with autumn trying its best to strew dead leaves over the calendar in the face of climate change.


A powerful impy


The convivial and multi-talented Mönk (a founding member of Hackney Area Tabletop Enthusiasts) was also generous enough to provide a shared bottle of Maelstrom from Docks Brewing - an appropriate name on the label for both the liquid inside and the event in general. This was an 11.5% imperial stout that I had a teeny pour of, I wasn’t letting that get away without trying it. It was like Christmas pudding in beer form, super syrupy (in a good way) with even a slight medicinal or aniseed taste and hints of port. Bloody lovely but that small taste was all I needed right then.

As well as that, in the fridge there was...Tennents Lager, which I’ve never had before and I was veeeerry apprehensive of given its notorious and absolutely rotten bigger brother beer but once curiosity (and possibly running out of other beer) got the better of me it turned out to be fine, a mellow, very easy drinking lager that wasn’t bad at all, if a bit lacking in flavour. None of the rank sugary corn-y taste you get with a lot of other cheap mass-produced lagers, just...drinkable and cold.

Necropolis28 Game 4:

The final battle of the day was against Hugh, a bloke who has multi-classed in the RPG we call life in the twin classes of archaeologist and lawyer, which I thought was cool as fuck. His Gathering was led by a Revenant rather than a Lich, which as I understood it was a leader with diminished spellcasting abilities in favour of just hitting stuff really really hard.

Maggut attack!!

The board was absolutely chock full of machinery, ruins and aerial walkways. There was barely a line of sight to be had so poor Snapris wasn’t able to get too much of a bead with his bow. We both sent models up to the walkways (after a brief discussion of what a skeletal horse climbing a ladder might look like) and set to battle.

Neither of us were prepared for what the mystery box held this time though...a GIANT CORPSE MAGGUT. The massive and truly disgusting model tunneled out of the ground, causing anyone on high terrain to fall to the ground and take damage, and then started laying waste to all models around. Not only that, but every time it moved it left a gigantic tunnel hole, very easy to fall into and be instantly Shattered. Snap decisions had to be made about whether or not we would work together to destroy this horror or just stab each other in the metaphorical back, and I pretty much instantly acted like a total prick and started trying to kill Hugh’s Gathering with long range bowshots instead of cooperating.


His revenge, gentlemanly and sportsmanlike though it was, didn’t hold back and he deftly sent one of my models plummeting down a maggot hole, following which the Giant Maggut surfaced right next to my Lich and ate him in one bite (14 points of damage in one go...ooff). After that it was a matter of all my guys falling like dominoes and cheering on Hugh as he eventually destroyed the maggut in a battle that reminded me a little of the hex-and-counter classic O.G.R.E. game. For my treachery and cowardice, I ended the game with a grand total of zero points. Hugh was the victor and so read out the envelope containing the narrative text of the ‘Win’ condition, which ended with a downbeat YOU ARE NOTHING.

RESULT: (pathetic) LOSS

So overall, an even split between defeat and victory. Plus, when the end-of-play tallies were compared, I pretty much fell dead in the centre with 28 (if I recall correctly). The winner, Pablo, scored a staggering 60 points by some unholy means. Prize badges were handed out to Pablo and Mönk, placing first and last in the respective leaderboards.


Take a big whiff


After some food and libations, it was time to head on to the RPG section of the day...

NecropOD&D Session AAR


Coming soon...

This was using my hack of the 1974 3LBB OD&D rules to allow players to use a new undead character class, The Amalgamated, sort of proto-Liches in the world of Necropolis28 who were as yet unaffiliated to any one of the three mana schools of Blood, Bone and Plasm, roughly equivalent to 4th level Fighters from OD&D.

PCs had to split 100 points between the three mana schools at character creation, representing their dedication to each. I had constructed a d100+ Gamma World-esque table for each of the three schools, with players then rolling d100+half of their points in the given school to be granted Gifts, special physical abilities of spells. Examples might be an Intestinal Lariat, Blassug’s Dental Proliferator, Aspect of the Flea, or dark and unknown magics such as Invoke The Liege of Leeches.

The % score in each mana school was then used as a rudimentary ‘skill’ system for tasks relating to Blood, Bone or Plasm abilities, and was also the chance to retain a spell after casting. Amalgamated HP were equal to double their CON score, with no obvious sources of healing (I mean, they’re already dead). Combat was to be conducted in DEX order. Can you tell I’ve been reading Arduin recently? I’ll be posting the ashcan version of these rules up on the blog and itch.io in the near future.

After spending quite a while on these rules and the adventure I was running, I was a little nervous when only three people in the pre-event admin had confirmed their interest to play. As so often happens, I needn’t have worried as I had a total of
eight players in the end. I’ve run OD&D for as many as 11 before, but this was the X factor of all the whacky untested abilities I’d written. However, I had the confidence that only experience and being three beers deep can bring, and I’d set a timer for a 2 hour session, so we dived in.


I talk with my hands a lot

The adventure was a jaunt into the ruined manor grounds of Gyaddergut The Persistent, an incredibly ancient Lich who had mastered every longevity spell except for those concerning his physical form, and gradually just crumbled away, leaving behind a selection of bodily relics scattered around the manor and gardens – his mummified brain, hands, heart, ears and balls. Finding three of these and Gyadderguts magick circle would enable the Amalgamated PCs to complete the ritual to ascend to Lich-hood and claim his manor for themselves.

Across the 2 hours, the group discovered a puzzle unlocking an aerial bridge of coagulated blood, a fight in the air against a swarm of screeching reanimated foetuses (leading to Mönk coining the death metal song title Foeticide upon the Bridge of Blood), magical stained glass windows that shattered into swarms of flickering shards, a magical miniaturisation trap, a poltergesit haunted dining room and a battle with Gyaddergut’s lover, an undead witch who clutched his heart to her chest. They only managed to retrieve two of the relics, Gyaddergut’s heart and his hands. Lots of the group said they’d have loved to carry on, but looking around at the players faces everyone looked pretty faded after hours of miniature gaming and I could feel myself starting to flag too, so I thought it was best to call it a night. Shame I didn’t get to describe the Undead Boglins living in the privy and playing contact sports with Gyaddergut’s balls, but as DJ Beats says in People Just Do Nothing, always leave them wanting more.

The various abilities and deformations of physical form that the group possessed seemed to be a lot of fun. Eight players probably was a little too many for this rules hack as there was some redundancy in the abilities across the group, but it still went well and I had some very encouraging feedback. Among the best was Peter’s remark that “it felt like the old days” – what more could an old-school DM ask for?

After that it was simply a matter of staying up way too late for an al fresco screening of Fulci’s masterpiece Zombie Flesh Eaters aka Zombi aka Zombie 2.

The following morning was spent feasting upon fried breakfast at a nearby biker cafe (Staffordshire oatcakes are a new discovery for me, I’m hooked) and watching some playthroughs of Ryan of Blightbones Miniatures experimental sci-fi terrainless miniatures game set on a world entirely consumed by flies and lit by eldritch lanterns! The combination of insanely far-out concept and a ruleset concise enough to fit on a pocketmod looked great and I’m very keen to see how that develops. Oh yeah, and the Crokinole set came out.

All-in-all this was a fantastic weekend full of necrotic energies and stupid death metal voices and I have to give props to Peter for such a fun game that’s inspired so many, and to Stu for hosting our foul carcasses in his home. The talent on display was insane, I’m shocked at the level of kitbashing and model-sculpting I saw, especially from some people who apparently were very new to sculpting and converting. The terrain in particular was awe-inspiring and lent a real dose of atmosphere to the proceedings.

Plus, I might be cynical, but from this
event and the brief glimpses I’ve had at the indie wargaming community, it’s in a much healthier place than RPGs are right now. It could well be a case of the necrotic grass being greener, but it seems in this side of the gaming hobby, the Cool Shit comes first, with less of the endless theory, cynicism, in-fighting, factionalism and bitterness that regularly soaks the independent and old-school RPG scene. I think we could learn from this.

I’m way behind on my con reports as I still need to do a writeup of Norwich Games Con ‘24 too, it’s only a month late, but that’s coming soon!

######

Some links to creators and artists I rubbed shoulders with this weekend:

Peter Vigors and Necropolis28. Rules are here and the Discord for the game can be found here.

Ryan Blightbones Miniatures: As close to ‘official’ Necropolis28 miniatures as there are. Amazing talent

Pablo Silvestrus: Beautiful demonic linocuts and jawdropping miniatures.

An article on Blades of Arazone, the DIY comic by J Edward Scott that wouldn’t be out of place on the gatefold of a Hawkwind LP

Stu ‘Herman Inclusus’ Kolakovic: Disgustingly talented artist. I hate you Stu.



(Only half the crew pictured the morning after. Note the Necrobin.
L-R: Yours truly, Stu, Pablo, Alex, Dan, Chris, Peter, Ryan, Mö
nk )










23/03/2024

d24 Denizens of Plammenzet Fort [Mutant Future/Gamma World]

Source photo from rarehistoricalphotos.com

M.F.O.S.C. campaign players stop reading here!!

Plammenzet is the biggest settlement in the Mutant Future/Gamma World campaign I'm running once a month, here's a little table to start to fill it out a bit. It's nestled into the mountains to the north and has a triple-walled fortification at front, with whispered rumours about the tunnels below, either stripped bare or with scattered tech of the ancients down there, depending on who you talk to. 

Mutant Plants are strictly forbidden in Plammenzet by Whaltri and The Gommonde, supreme crime lords!

1 - A local drunk gathers a rabble of Synthetics around him. Hek nows the exact way to shortcut their interest/attention loops so they keep listening to his boring bounty hunter stories. (1d6+1 Synthetics)

2 - A floating insect-headed lump with extendable telescopic limb attachments (worth 1d6x100 in machine parts) is looking for an escort to sketch and paint some of the wretched mountain vistas beyond the forgotten northern walls of the city.

3 - Two hulking Pure Strain Humans wear boots and ancient camo patterning. They are obssessed with physical strength training manuals from the ancient times and will pay 300gp worth of materials per tome delivered to them, though any weaklings wishing an audience with them will be hard pressed to gain their attention. STR 19.

4 - Rabboxen breeder. He appears at first as a Pure Strain Human in blue face paint, though it will become apparent his nature is otherwise when he regurgitates his stomach in order to feed. He has stock of a certain strain that requires only half rations, and another that can be trained to explosively self-destruct with threatened. He is always in the market for uncorrupted stock of any herd or pack animal from the wilderness.

5 - A braggart Mutant Wolf. He considers unfurred Mutant Animals to be a simple waste of DNA. An expert in salvage and mechanical recovery, his presence may grant a re-roll to any failed Tech Roll, but tends to commands exorbitant prices for his accompaniment on missions, and will readily follow a party to claim jump. He dwells in a conical plasteel structure in the centre of Plammenzet.

6 - A mechanical doomsayer. It is 27% human tissue, and will hector anyone who will listen about the poetry of its pustules and decaying flesh. It is otherwise largely composed of glass lenses and grippers, and slithers around on a mass of cabling and piping. CON 11. Stun Ray: lasts for 1d3 rounds.

7 - Undertunnel delvers. A group of Pure Strain Humans and Mutant Humans who have ultimate plans to join the M.E.M.S.A. society, though they are yet to take the Prejudical Oaths and are in fact somewhat divided on the ethics of the society. That have proof that the rumours of the futility in deliving into the undertunnels beneath Plammenzet are in fact false, and those that know where to look can find tech and goods of value. They are scavenging for the necessary gift to get M.E.M.S.A. to admit them as members.

8 - The Society for Vegetal Beautification at Plammenzet (S.V.B.P.). A complete mix of all types, united by a mildly fanatical cause, namely that greater variety in urban planning at Plammenzet will encourage the citizens to greater things. Their focus, of course, is the importation of a greater variety of food crops and plants to decorate the settlement. This is viewed with suspicion given Whaltri and The Gommonde's view of Mutant Plants. There is a 10% chance when speaking to a member of this group that they are secretly dedicated to the welfare of Mutant Plants. They wear green robes, copper circlets and carry bolos as weapons.

9 - "Coded by Whaltri". A group of Pure Strain Humans who wear purple face paints. This cult has sprung up around a belief in the higher origins of the crime boss Whaltri. They believe he is the 37th incarnation of God. As proof, each states that they have received a secret three digit number in their dreams, indicated that they are special - Coded by Whaltri. They are bedecked in Plate Armour and own several Vibro Swords.

10 - Billowers. 14 Mutant Humans  with wavering, ballooning, pouching skin. They will grasp PCs hands and with whispering voices enquire if they need any work doing. As a group they are fascinated with objects from the sky, space beings and planetary systems. They are armed with slings and daggers, and may strike with the latter for triple damage if hidden in shadows.

11 - Khaldador, a Mutant Human borne in a covered litter held by four Pure Strain Human bearers. He studies routes into the Plammenzet undertunnels using ancient manuals. He believes many of these tunnels in fact extend far under the city and outside of its bounds beneath the mountains to the north. He has never ventured there himself due to a weak constituion and extreme sensitivity to light of all kinds. He values knowledge above all else. He can emith coagulating rays in a 30' radius that cause the thickening of mucus, causing choking in all who fail a Save Vs Stun. The effect lasts for 2d4 rounds, and causes 1d10 damage each round. His most prized possession is a Condition 3 Mk2 Laser Pistol.

12 - Seven bipedal orange-skinned Mutant Anteaters covered in scaly buboes. They seek work for food, and are somewhat lazy, preferring jobsi nvolving intimidation or thuggery. They are easily bored. Their mutations are variable: 25% spit acid cloud every three rounds 20' radius 5d6 damage, Save Vs Poison for half. If hit twice by this attack, normal armour is rendered useless. 25% active wing development. 25% mental blast (3d6). WIL 9.

13 - Yashmina, a Pure Strain Human infested with seeping nanobot colonies who only has three months to live as a result. She occasionally coughs violently, giving up gouts of black foam, though she tries her best to hide it. She is a good fighter with her morningstar, having +3 to damage, and being able to disarm an opponent on a 19 or 20. He nanobot infestation gives her perfect night vision and an inability to eat normal food. Her main wish is to overthrow Whaltri and take command of Plammenzet, though she knows there is slim chance. Finding a cure would merely be a nice bonus.

14 - Eleven rolling Mutant Beetles, covered with organic studs and spikes all over their lustrous brown carapaces. They also fight with whips causing 1d3 damage, that entangle and trip opponents 1-in-6 times, though any DEX bonus will negate this. They attack as an initial avalanche of rolling beetle fury, causing 7d6 damage per individual on their first round of combat. They have dual heads and a WIL of 15. Their main belief is in the value of hard work, and insist any accompanying PCs engage in morning exercises. They are on the lookout for a new habitat to engage in their upcoming frenzy of copulation and subsequent spawning (the frenzy is due to occur in 3d6x2 weeks).

15 - Andar, a dark woman with a bulging stomach into which run wires and metallic filaments. Her right arm is an enormous circular saw that causes 3d6+6 damage in combat and is worth 3500gp in parts. "Just try and take it" she entreats aggressors. She escaped frtom a testing facility of some kind to the far north, her memory having been entirely wiped by means she does not understand. Though she dislikes intoxication, it does occasionally jog her memory. She wishes to increase her security/access clearance cards collection, which she sports on a string around her neck, though she does not understand their ranking (1d3 cards, refer to Gamma World 1e for security card information).

16 - Gurbanik, a human(oid) dressed head to toe in echoing green plate mail armour which he never removes. This is due to the fact he is horribly burned and ashamed of his appearance. OTherwise cocky, he brandishes as brutal looking Condition 4 submachine gun and shortsword. He runs into battle with the cry "It's Gurbanik's kill!!". He seeks a good life, adventure, and drinks he can enjoy through a straw via his visor. He believes those that have unfulfilled desires just don't want it enough. CON 14, WIL 14. He takes pity on anyone or anything that is disfigured or ugly. 

17 - Harmabul, a sleek, black swan-like Mutant Animal of indeterminate origin. It is a sharpshooter with a longbow, causing +3 damage and able to get off two shots per round if stationary. It seeks to form a warrior clan, but its standards for recruits are impossibly high. It takes a dim view of poor tactics.

18 - Abbagone. A Mutant Human with a long serpentine torso and 11 legs who travels with a huge armoured box of his luggage. He can control the weather once per week for 1d8 turns. Secretly, he believes (incorrectly) this is because he is in touch with an ancient satellite. He wishes to destroy a rival gang leader, Tobrax (see below).

19 - Tobrax, a crystal-infested Pure Strain Human. The crystals studding his skin are black, emerald and topaz coloured. Tobrax believes that Plammenzet is far more vulnerable to attack than it realises. He thinks Mutant Plants should be admitted as common sense, making use of their varied mutations to bolster defenses. He listens for rumours of merchant caravans and forms impromptu raiding parties, rarely recruiting the same warriors twice. Tobrax disdains any concept of hierarchical rule.

20 - A headless Mutant Human with speech-synthesis modules built into its arms (value 1300gp). It is photosynthetic, and is also able to cause its feet to combust, attacking with furious flaming kicks for 2x2d6 damage - though it will then suffer 2d6 damage once combat is concluded. It is otherwise armed with a flanged mace. It is a bodyguard for hire that is not shy about demanding its share of the loot. Often given to sardonic jokes in its crackling and buzzing voice that emanates from the sythesisers. Its partners was slain by Canusoids, for which it has a violent hatred and +2 to hit.

21 - Umlaut, a membranous web-covered Mutant Marsupial, like a half-formed slimy joey. Darkly given to trance-like predictions of doom. He collects crystal shards for their 'magical powers', and one of them does in fact inflict Class 4 Radiation on all within 30' if it is struck. He wishes to work with Whaltri, but has already been denied in disgust twice.

22 - A pachydermal tripod Mutant Animal of unknown origin. It appears as a creature of tough grey skin (AC 4) around an orb structure on three columnar legs. It may look bizarre, and is extremely quiet, but it speaks perfect common in a small piping voice ans has INT 15, WIL 16. It can attack with tusks for 2 x 1d12. It wishes to view the sea for the first time, to possibly live and hunt there, and is naturally curious.

23 - Oolad the Carver. An armless Mutant Human who has had a fighting blade fitted to his left foot (1d6 damage) and owns a collection of 1d3 grenades he does not understant the function of. He sadly believes that true craftsmanship is dead, and that there is spiritually no excuse for the use of debased, broken or primitive implements or tools. His main believe is that skilfullt carved wood could elevate civilisation to its next highest stage, and is saddened at the lack of real good quality unmutated wood - and would love to establish a grove of precious trees. Despite his eccentricity, he is genuinely a master craftsman and will endlessly discuss woodcarving with anyone.

24 - Spasom, a Mutated Animal of unknown mammalian origin. It has a tiny head with a trio of blinking black eyes and is covered with tawny fur fading to white. It has extremely long hands and feet and a chattery manner of speech - it is never still. Spasom is overly fond of food and intoxicants. It carries sharpened metal discs which it can throw at a rate of three per round is stationary, range 15/30/45 for 1d6 damage. Its insistent chattering can make speech, sleep, or listening at doors rather difficult. At the end of every third day, Spasom sleeps like the dead for 24 hours and cannot be woken by any means save strong stimulants. Its motivations are difficult to determine due to its extreme flightiness, though it has a strong fascination with writing implements of the ancients such as ink, pens or pencils.

27/01/2024

Coffee Set of Ghantr-Ooon [OD&D] [Magic Item]

This collection of five plain-looking bronze cups has no handles or ornament other than a single band of differing material around the circumference, 1” in width. These coloured bands each sport a different icon as described below. Accompanying these is a grinder made of dark wood with complex cog apparatus, spinning handle and a removable lid. Alongside this is a copper jug with plunger lid to strain and pour liquids.

Grinding the reagent pictured on any one of the bands, then brewing the resultant powder using the copper flask and 1/5 of a waterskin of boiling water will produce the following one dose of brews when poured into the corresponding cup.

Grinding anything other than depicted reagents in the grinder causes a horrible clanking sound (and see Other below).

The colour of the steaming brew produced is the opposite colour to the colour of the band of the cup’s reagent (refer to a colour wheel). Unless a duration is specified, treat as potions that must be drunk immediately while hot, or they revert to clear water.

Ivory / White / A Tooth / makes a black brew

Gives the ability to breathe one cloud of black vapour that will dissolve 10’ of stone, but then inflicts extreme dizziness for 1d6 turns. It has no other effect on flesh or wood.

Azurite / Blue / An Insect / makes a neon orange brew
Produces an intense itching inside the brain pan of the drinker that persists for a turn if they Save Vs Poison, or a day if not. Depending on circumstances this is deleterious to concentration in combat, and if the drinker’s HP fall to ¼ or less, acts as a failed save against a Confusion spell.

Amber / Yellow-ish Orange / An Eyeball / makes a blue brew

Allows the drinker to blast bolts of blue energy from their eyes as a ranged weapon (50’) causing 2d6 damage per hit. The effect lasts for 1 turn.

Jade / Deep Green / A Fresh Fingertip / makes a red brew

In melee, successful strikes from the drinker cause a rattling blow straight to the skeletal structure of their opponents (including chitinous plates and the like). Roll 1d3 once when drunk – this is the amount of extra damage caused by strikes from the opponent for the duration. No effect on non-skeletal frames.

Peridot / Lime Green / A Frog / makes a violet brew

Allows the drinker jumping abilities as Boots of Travelling and Leaping. Provided the drinker is unarmoured, they can also breathe underwater.

Other

If a brew produced by anything other than the reagent pictured is poured into a cup, a noxious smelling black foam pours out of the cup, destroying it and attacking any nearby as a Grey Ooze for 1d6 rounds and consuming 5 charges.

The coffee set has d100 charges when found, and correctly preparing any one brew consumes a single charge. Once all charges are used, the set appears ancient, sadly dented and forgettable. The complete set, intact with all bands undamaged, is worth 2500gp on the open market, but Magic-Users of Alchemists will be aware that the actual value is nearer to 8000gp if charges remain.

Ghantr-Ooon was a hag known throughout the Southern Crustlands for her cruelty and abduction of children. Her downfall came about when she was ambushed and hanged by a rope of hair made from unicorn pelt by the hero The Nauseous Chanter.

31/12/2023

Books read in 2023 (non-RPG)

 Asterisks indicate re-reads - # asterisks = # rereads.
* indicates comics.

## Book of the New Sun Vol 1: Shadow & Claw - Gene Wolfe
Swift to Chase - Laird Barron
*The Complete Nemesis Vol 1 - Pat Mills, Kev O Neill, Bryan Talbot
Design as Art - Bruno Munari
*Smashed - Junji Ito
Hyperion - Dan Brown
The Dangers of Smoking In Bed - Mariana Enriquez
The Wide Carnivorous Sky - John Langan
London, The Biography - Peter Ackroyd
Slime: A Natural History - Susanne Wedlich
Lonesome Dove - Larry McMurtry
Think - Simon Blackburn
Flashing Swords #1 - Vance, Carter, Anderson, Lieber
Surrealism and the Occult - Nadia Choucha
The Complete Fantasies Vol 2 - Clark Ashton Smith
Get Shorty - Elmore Leonard
*But You Have Friends - Emilia McKenzie
*Collected Britney & Tina comics - Jade King
*Sour Pickles - Clio Isidora
Object Oriented Ontology - Graham Harman
The Shores of Death  - Michael Moorcock
Mr Gaunt and Other Uneasy Encounters - John Langan
King Kull - Robert E Howard
Light
- M John Harrison
*J'rbul comics by Coozilpm and assorted short comix
They - Kay Dick
The Canopy of Time - Brian Aldiss
UFOs: A Scientific Debate - ed Carl Sagan / Thornton Page
The Dead Secret - Wilkie Collins
Children of the Fang - John Langan
BLAST Your Way To Megabuck$ - Ramsey Dukes

...various other mini-comix and zines and stuff I am no doubt forgetting.

Happy New Year!

10/12/2023

Dragonmeet 2023 Convention Report!



Memory fails me - this was either my fourth or fifth time attending Dragonmeet, the UK’s largest RPG focussed gaming convention. If there was ever a reminder that the actual experience of the roleplaying game scene - in person, away from jaded ironic scrawls on computer screens or the sickly glow of pathetic social media beef seeping out of your phone – is a very different and far more reasonable and friendly world than the one on the internet, Dragonmeet is (mostly) it, so I’d been looking forward to this for a while.

I bucked my usual trend of waking up too late for gaming conventions and marched through the freezing morning to get an even earlier train than planned, and was soon inside the grim concrete and carpet edifice that is Hammersmith Novotel West, coffee in hand and half an hour earlier than I needed to be (8.30am). I visited the trade hall pre-opening hours to meet Dan, Other Dan and Shuyi at the Melsonia and Iglootree stalls where they were setting up shop.

Wares

This was to be my second iteration of the con under the aegis of Melsonian Arts Council. Last year I was in-situ with my drawing board and materials as I worked at inking in some artwork for Troika character backgrounds, which was simultaneously a good confidence building exercise and also furnished a perfect opportunity for minimising eye contact, but had the perhaps mixed blessing of feeling like I was at the convention for only about fifteen minutes because I was concentrating on drawing. This year I elected to simply bring some original artwork along for sale in a binder, picking from (hopefully) well known pieces such as Drigbolton, Old-School Essentials and Dolmenwood. In the event there were no sales (although I did shift several prints) but some of the better-known pieces were certainly a crowd puller and I had a couple of people contact me about future potential sales. A middle ground between actively drawing and displaying stuff should work better next year.

Assisting the guys at Melsonian Arts Council and Iglootree with some unboxing and ensconcing of merchandise, I had a very brief chat with Chris Bisette about the rebooted future of the ancient (no, older than that – no, older) RPG franchise <REDACTED> and how content made by its dedicated fanbase would fit into the terms of its new license. Vowing to come and investigate the new IP holder’s stall later for some answers (a vow I was to completely forget in the chaos the con), I realised I was late, and so quickly collected my materials and made my way to the day’s first major commitment – running Troika in the first booked RPG slot!

 

Whalgravaak’s Warehouse Play Report (0900-1300)

[!SPOILERS FOLLOW!]



Four hours of gaming incoming

First up, I was running the new Troika 1:5 adventure written and illustrated by yours truly, Whalgravaak’s Warehouse. To up the ante for a convention game, I had set up a scoring system based on the number of pages the party was able to recover from The Manual of Operations, the arcane book of instructions to the Warehouse’s defunct transportation system. This may be the first time Troika has been run ‘tournament’ style! We should set up a leader board.

A Claviger, Monkeymonger, Necromancer and a Rhino-Man made up the party. Thwarted by the evil purple portcullis blocking the main entrance and its harmful resistance to Open spells, they decided to brave the Worm-Headed Hound tunnels leading beneath the warehouse itself. A quick and brutal fight with the squirmy dog-things meant a nasty mauling for the Rhino-Man, but skilful use of an improvised noisemaking trap by the Claviger scared off the beasts and allowed the party to delve into the urine soaked tunnels.

Emerging into the building proper, they encountered a dual-headed snake Cacogen of noble occult bearing and cut a deal with him to open some troublesome doors in return for a bundle of pages he had acquired. Giving the shifting Sphere Pool room a wide berth after witnessing the bizarre distance stretching properties it possessed and the weird machinery inside, they headed to the north through a room full of giantic spools of rope, and some deactivated-looking forklift automata.

"Waaah waaah the initiative system is so weird"

Another room contained a huge vat with a sparkly indigo puddle around it, dried to a magical looking crust. While some of the party took the time to eat some provisions and recover stamina, the Monkeymonger attempted to deduce the nature of this magical stain by lobbing one their more inferior monkeys onto it. A flash of light! A sudden forceful psychic assault on the mind Claviger! He made his Luck test successfully, but it was a near thing – a failed roll would have meant he’d swapped bodies with a 1 Stamina monkey. The unfortunate simian was fried to death by the magic.

Several more rooms were explored, including one so warped by the shifting energies of the building that the contents of its crates had achieved sentience over the centuries. The result of this chaotic magic? A pile of talking dried fish. A somewhat morally grey encounter occurred in which these tiny amiable delicacies were quizzed for information about the denizens of the warehouse (the rattling dusty creatures that lived to the north were described as carrying things ‘wrapped in paper’) and eventually, eaten for sustenance. Time was ticking on, lamp oil was running low, and still only a handful of pages had been discovered.

The scoring/reputation system

A room full of moisture draining black and yellow sponges floating amongst shattered wreckage was circumnavigated to discover some substantial rooms full of crated seeds. Investigation of a crack in the wall from which issued the very incongruous sounds of a battle in full progress was suddenly thwarted by an attack from two utterly bizarre monsters – Chaotic Spawnlets!

These horrors took the appearance of a gigantic crawling vulture’s head with eyes, ears and noses lining the inside of its beak, and a human torso atop a pair of skittering legs that ‘fired’ regenerating heads at range. This was a fairly frantic battle with the Monkeymonger managing to crawl up the legs of the skitterer and stab it in the torso multiple times, while the Claviger used his strength skill to haul crates into defensive positions and protect the vulnerable Necromancer. Skilled attacks from the Rhinoman aided the Monkeymonger and eventually the creatures were destroyed. An attempt by the Necromonger to reanimate one of them using the Posthumous Vitality spell unfortunately caused the corpse to explode instead, a very messy business.

Returning to the sounds of the battlefield through the crack, a battle between two sets of minute combats was seen, warriors no larger than a fingernail locked in mortal combat according to their allegiances – one side sporting red armour, the other green. Most importantly for the party, however, these armies had repurposed several pages as their battle standards! An unsuccessful attempt by the Necromancer to instigate a truce using his relationship counselling skill meant it was down to the Rhino-Man to wade in and snap off these standards to add the pages to their collection, though he took significant damage to his flanks from several tiny phalanxes of spearmen.

 

Worm-headed Hounds!

Passing back through the room of dessicating sponges, a final room was explored by the party - an area stocked with a collection of tusks taken from creatures of every shape and size. The place was inhabited by some loathsome Membroid Ghouls. A deadly combat atop the shelving units nearly made a nasty end for the Claviger as they were enveloped in a membrane and gnawed on, taking damage each time an initiative token was drawn. The Monkeymonger’s skill in climbing was used to advise the Rhino-Man of a safe route to the top of the rickety shelves to aid in the combat, and once the Claviger was freed, the remaining ghoul was hurled to its death off of the lofty shelves, down on to the sharp tusks littering the floor (previously set as a trap by the Claviger in a wise precaution). Amongst the foul creatures’ treasure – several Pocket Gods wrapped in pages from The Manual of Operations. At that, we called the game and tallied up the number of pages recovered.

The party’s reputation at the end of the adventure: PASSABLE NOVITIATES. Not bad!

Thanks to Will, Fifi, Damien and Axel for an excellent game! Everyone played their pregens to the utmost, creative play and use of skills, tactical thinking...everything you want in a con game!

Gratifyingly, the adventure has played out totally differently each time I have run it. Since non-linearity was a main design aim I think we can count this a success. Always lots of fun to bring old-school dungeon crawling procedure to Troika (complete with player mapping on graph paper). I hope this book inspires many others to get into location-based adventures for the game.

The adventure is now out in PDF and is currently a best seller on DTRPG for products under a fiver! The hardcopy books should be back from the printer soon.

 

Troika + Dungeon

 

Subsequently… (1300-1800)

After that, it was a matter of scarfing down a banana and a vile room temperature pre-purchased Tesco sandwich from my bag (Harissa and Roast Vegetables, essentially a salted sponge with a few extra calories), then availing myself from the dubious jar of mints provided by Hammersmith Novotel in their conference rooms before returning to the bustling trade hall to assist my Melsonian brethren.

The next few hours (between 1300-1800) are a bit of a blur, if I’m honest. Tons of delightful people came to meet us, and lots of old friends were spoken to.

However, one clear highlight did emerge – the opportunity to meet with Brit fantasy illustration legend, the almighty wizard Tony Hough!

If anyone is somehow unfamiliar with his work, this is the guy behind several iconic Games Workshop and latter day Fighting Fantasy art pieces (Genestealer Patriarch anyone?). His style somehow manages to encapsulate all of the murky grandeur of those old days, while still standing confidently unique, always pushing forward with his style and seamlessly incorporating modern technology. The man can depict everything from utter horror to whimsical madness, with crowd scenes a speciality. 

 Genestealer Patriarch by Tony Hough

Tony has done some work recently for MAC, as a result of his flyering the stall last year, when I sadly didn’t get a chance to meet him. This year, he was incredibly generous with his time and he tracked me down to show me a binder full of his original artwork. Trading tips and methods with old-school fantasy illustrators like this is such a help in combating the ever-persistent impostor syndrome and a hugely important part of these events for me. Favourite bit of advice from Tony? “Don’t show clients your thumbnail sketches, they don’t understand what they’re for and they’ll just start fucking saying things!”. What a guy! We’ve got a whole bunch of artwork in the chamber for some upcoming Troika books by him, and you’ll just have to trust me for now when I tell you they are incredible pieces of art.

Me and Tony just hangin' out

Some other fortuitous chats n’ meetings in the afternoon included Alfred Valley (yet another RPG person I hadn’t realised was a Londoner), Josh Blincow (author of the upcoming MAC adventure The Perilous Pear & Plum Pies of Pludwick) who was lovely and so young-looking that I felt like a crumbling skeleton next to him, the always delightful Paolo of Lost Pages (Lasagna Con 2024 maybe!), JVC Parry and several others.

I also got a chance to meet the extremely friendly guys from Strange Attractor press, publishers of countercultural books, outsider art, weird music, occultisma panoply of the esoteric and bizarre. Word is they’ll be organising some more RPG related stuff in future so keep a close eye. Hopefully I’ll get a chance to work with them soon.

 

After hours… (1800-2300)

One complaint I have each year is that the con tends to die down very quickly in gaming terms after 6pm – when the trade hall closes. My plan this year was to remedy this by running an off-grid one shot of Leo Hunt’s excellent science fantasy RPG Vaults of Vaarn, for which I had put in considerable prep for a toroidal 19 location pointcrawl (including a wedge of pregens), but alas it was not to be. Those potential players most interested – John and Stacey, organisers of Norwich Games Convention, Bruce Pennington Cunnington, and London RPG socialite Turran H all had reasons for not being able to play – a long drive home, lack of options to extend parking, and already being in their cups – not necessarily in that order. A quick game of Melee was mooted but in the end the decision was made to drink and nerd out instead.

Still, if I have a GM’s motto, it’s ‘Prep doesn’t have a use-by date’ so back into the folder this particular adventure (The Skewed Torus) goes, perhaps one to run for my family this Christmas, or simply as a one shot around one of London’s venerable boozers.

Somewhat pleasantly resigned, I settled in for a few hours of mildly bibulous socialising. Among the topics covered included X-Crawl, Lankhmar, funnels, weapon vs AC minutiae, inflated HP pools in Gamma World and its clones, vegan wrestlers, soil, dog skulls, buying books off people you think are a bit dodgy, the mummy vs mummified human remains terminology battle, Victorian bastards, lacquered dolphin skulls and much much more.

Special mention must be given to the delightful and hilarious company of the French translators of Troika, Pattern Recog Editions. The two gentlemen in question, Jack and Jean-Christoph, were sat in company with Frank (aka Mottokrosh) and Dave who publish the Hypertellurians RPG and we had a great time talking about Manowar disappointing French metalheads, Magma, French cinema, and dinosaur-related pornography. I’m not gonna explain that last one but it wasn’t my fault...

 Clockwise from left: Frank, Jean-Christophe, Me, Photobombing Barmaid, Dave, Jack

Each year, rumours circulate that this will be the last one in the airless chambers of Novotel West. We can only hope that this – or the next – will be the last one in these blasted halls. Not that it is difficult to get to, and it is clean and spacious, but the beer selection and bar service is, quite frankly, shite. When the bar was working ‘properly’ drinkers have the following bewildering selection on draught:

Stella Artois

Bud Light

Guinness

Orchard Pig Cider

Corona, of all things

I told you it was bad. Now, picture a scenario where you can not only wait 30 minutes to get served, but one in which every single one of those options barring Corona runs out. No, I would not like a stale lime slice in my pint of tasteless piss thank you barman. Still, good times were had despite the poor quality libations, and the evening passed by merrily.

Leaving the hotel around 2300 to grab some falafel (food of the gods) from the always friendly and stalwart Lebanese Taverna (which I actually will miss when/if the con moves location), I quickly consumed the enfolded fried chickpea snack en route to the station and headed home to chilly South East London.

So in summary, perhaps a more subdued Dragonmeet than last year, but a pleasant one as always. Next year I hope for some more prolonged gaming in the evening. Until then, see you all next time!

07/11/2023

[Troika] 12 Goods from Scratalg

A fragment of notes from a Troika setting that's been festering on my G Drive doing nothing.

Scratalg is a dark world with a single city, also called Scratalg. Picture an orb from which a thick segment has been removed in the manner of a chocolate orange. The city covers each inner face of this negative segment, two massive districts facing inwardly towards each other, the up of each forming the down of the facing district.

Artificial gravities allow citizens to walk on either district, to pass from one to another, or to leave the city and walk on the curved surface of the sphere, The Rind.

The city is lit by a permanent cone of light emanating into the wedge from Weatherbrain, a stationary satellite in the ether. Anything outside of this light is considered The Rind, Scratalg's dark and inhospitable surface where no star mars the sky.

Here's some goods you might find in Scratalg city itself.


(O) at the end of an item’s description indicates it is outlawed.


Dried Mages (Bundle): Just add water to revive one of these tottering, senile agents to full size and relative animation. Each knows one random spell (and a Special Skill with it of 1-6), has a base Skill of 1-3. Upon casting the spell they burst into dust, dead forever. 1D6 mages.



Rind-Air: When huffed, this sealed pot of air from the Rindside is rumoured to temporarily undo years of cultivation a Rindsider may have accquired from living in Scratalg, reverting them to their so-called primitive state.


Dancing Blades: This tiny set of curved brightly coloured knives click and skitter around in pavanes and gavottes if shaken and thrown on the ground. 2D6 blades.



Cud Block: A soft dun-coloured block of dense foodstuff that will revive double the amount of Stamina of a normal Provision, at the cost of unutterable boredom and ennui in the eater. 1D3 blocks.


Gigerhosen: A heavy device on wheels with an extendable nozzle. If the central handle is twisted, an uncontrollable cloud of pale gas burst forth, rendering the flesh of anyone it touches to malleable, snappable putty for 1d6 hours. (O)


Clonespotter Pellets: A handful of ball-bearing sized orbs. If thrown onto the skin of a cloned being, they instantly raise yellowish seeping welts. They have no effect on a non-clone. 1D3 handfuls.


Axis Flashbangs
: When thrown onto surface X or Y of Scratalg city, these paper wrapped twists of powder cause 1d6 nearby beings and their accoutrements to be instantly transported to the corresponding place on the opposite surface with a glare and dramatic sound. 1D3 flashbangs. (O)


Free Scuttlepede Pass (Life)
: Although no Opulent Bureaucrat has heard of such a document, when run through the necessary checks, this somehow proves legitimate.


Grotgoyle Tadpoles:
Each about the size of a thumb, thoughtless and flightless, this jar contains a swarm of larval Grotgoyles in amniotic juice. You’re not supposed to have these. No matter what you think of them, Grotgoyles are a protected species. 4D6 tadpoles. (O)


Lummox Templates:
House-sized blocks of inert flesh. Lummoxes remain in this state until a job-code is imprinted on them, at which point they assume their familiar micro-headed giant form. When the job is complete, they dutifully snuggle up next to each other and return to their template form. 1D3 templates.


Augmentation Grab Bag:
A whirring, clicking cloth sack containing all sorts of cybernetic detritus and probably a significant amount of genetic crud. Usually nothing truly life-changing in these but you’d be amazed at what people throw away. 1 bag.


Assassin’s Note: If someone is slapped in the face with this white glove, a holographic mark will float a foot above their head at all times until they are killed, someone else is slapped with the glove, or the mark is somehow removed. This mark is specific to an assassin, and if they find out someone else has been using it they might not be happy. 1 glove. (O)